Ryan Morris

Private to Lyle

I know we don't always get along perfectly and maybe sometimes I don't act proper-like. But thanks a lot for being a mate that night, helping me out and all. It meant a lot that you kept my secret. I don't want to be used as ammunition. So thank you. If you ever need anything maybe I can help somehow. I'll try to be a better roommate.

End to Lyle

Private to Spencer and Caleb

I haven't touched my drums since my uh, re-admission. Fancy a jam?

End to Spencer and Caleb

God, why do they keep this castle so fucking hot today? Would someone turn down the fireplaces or furnaces or something? I'm about to go jump in a snow bank or the lake or something. I'm dying here and I'm even next to the window!

Private to Self

I wonder what it felt like for Kirke and Julian to be under those potions today? Could they only feel hate or were there other things? Is it like what I feel now? I'm starting to worry all I can feel is this pressure in my chest, ever. Are things ever going to be normal again?

Dad, Mom where are you? Can you write me? Will they let you? Are they going to summon me to the Wizengamot to testify? Oh God, what if they give Dad the Kiss like they did Towler? ARGH! I CAN'T STOP THINKING!!

Fuck. I'm going to take Julian's calming draught he gave me a few days ago. I heard you can't dream if you fall asleep with one. My leg kind of feels weird tonight. It's like it keeps wanting to fall asleep. I think I'll take the hint.

End to Private

Private to Hufflepuff

My Father was is a very good man and he would never, ever kidnap me. That's not how it happened. Those are shit lies being told but most of you already guessed that. I don't care what the Slytherins think. They can believe whatever the fuck they want.

My Dad helped design cars, British cars. Some of the best in the world, I imagine. The kinds that if you saw it going down the road in a good British racing green colour, you got a little hot, a little moist and a lot giddy. He helped design DB7. I used to have a poster of it over my bed before they took it away. He's not this bloke that Carrow wants to make him out as.

Trying to get away from all this might have been stupid but we tried because my father was in danger, Mum wasn't much better off and they didn't want me learning the tripe they're trying to teach us here. I'm sorry if I let you all down or if I drew all this unwanted attention on our house. It wasn't worth it in the end.

There's nothing heroic about being a Snatcher either. They're monsters. I wanted to get that out because it's true.

I'm not asking for your pity and I don't want to talk about what happened yet. But if your Mum and Dad are safe right now be thankful. You should write them. They probably worry about you.

End to Hufflepuff

Private to Self

I can't keep hiding from everybody, this isn't working. Nothing and nobody feels safe, not even my mates. I don't want them to ask what happened. It'll get twisted around like that bitch did in Muggle Studies.

I can't believe Spencer's gay. It sounds weird to write. Spencer Quick fancies men. Or boys or whatever you want to say when you're this age. He's not the type I pictured at all. How did I miss that? I thought I was good at figuring out shit like that. I didn't see that one coming. Am I that in my head?

I can't believe he told everybody either. Merlin's balls if I fancied cock I'd keep that hidden away from everybody right now. I just hope he doesn't think I'm avoiding him because he likes boys. I'm okay with him liking them. I mean I don't even care if he did fancy me and looked at me that way. It's a compliment to be fancied, isn't it? Of course not that I can do anything to help him with it because I can't really. I don't think I could fancy a boy, could I? Don't think I fancy where my cock has to go for it all to work out.

End to Self

No, I don't know where I'm going
But, I sure know where I've been.
Hanging on the promises
In the songs of yesterday.
An' I've made up my mind.
I ain't wasting no more time.
( Here I Go Again. )